My Life Yesterday, in Posts of 140 Characters or Less

• 09:05 Just woke up, let the dog out, need to let the dog in because she's freaking out to get back in (then she'll freak out to go back out, etc.) #
• 09:08 Whoah, she's frisky! Jumping on Delia in the bed, running in crazed circles around the house . . . #
• 10:23 Time for breakfast, a hot water bottle for my feet in bed, and turning the pages of a fresh book I haven't read. Setting the timer for 60. #
• 11:33 I love it when zits slow-leak pus that crisps into tiny salty mountains on my face overnight. The joy of picking these off is indescribable. #
• 11:33 But now? Now I must work! Actually, now I must prep some packages to go into the mail. My mom's milk duds have been tempting Delia. #
• 11:53 Woops! I meant to say whoppers, not milk duds. They're fond of malted milk balls NOT stiff caramel turds. #
• 12:48 Blogging about masturbating always makes me want to masturbate. Waiting for Delia to go to the gym so I can do it in private. #
• 13:07 I really want to masturbate in private. HATE that my door won't even close, let alone lock, due to cam cables, etc. About to lose my mind. #
• 13:37 When I get rich I am building myself a private masturbation/porn closet secret room thingy. #
• 14:23 Whew! 3 orgasms later I feel much better (except now I don't feel like finishing blog entry). Lunch time? #
• 14:49 Why am I watching girls on youtube reinterpreting the Philip Seymour Hoffman phone scenes from "Happiness"? #
• 16:07 FUCK me running! Time zone shit is off on Rude so my carefully planned News Flash is all fucked up. I have *1* hour planned, NOW, not later. #
• 16:10 And I do not have two hours to make it up to members who planned on 4 pm plus Rude people who planned on 5 pm. Dark cloud over my head. #
• 16:40 There are too many cool people in the world that I'll never have the time to get to know or the social skills to befriend. #
• 16:55 Oh yeah. I almost forgot I have to put on PANTS before I go out in the world to run errands. #
• 18:32 Going to the movies. Was working on my new GoodReads profile: www.goodreads.com/profile/trixiefontaine #
• 21:49 Miss Pettigrew? A deeeeeeeeeeelight!! A real MOVIE, totally fucking awesome. Could almost smell Amy Adams' ginger pussy in silk tap pants. #

These were chunks of my life yesterday as posted on my twitter page, automatically shipped by LoudTwitter